Charlotte
Can Blog
Charlotte Westburg's 4D design blog
How did this come about anyhow?
the inside scoop
*Their names are obvious. Starting from the right we have Betty, Sherry, Judy, Penny, Dorthy and whomever is behind the camera (I would know her name if I could only see her face but judging by her selfless nature and inability to inform the front two women of when she planned to take the picture, she is without a shadow of a doubt named Mildred. Her gentle strength betrays her ability to stay outside of my insightful eye). These women have gathered together for tea and pastries. They have no need for further reason. In terms of motivation, the consumption of warm liquids and sugary foods reign supreme. The main character is Betty. She also doubles as the black sheep, quite literally she is the only one who is sporting black. There is a gentle beam of light that falls across her hair and right shoulder. If you look into her eyes it becomes clear that she is less thrilled to be there than the other ladies. She has already gotten her pastry, unable to wait the socially acceptable amount of time one must wait before cordially admitting that one would in fact quite enjoy a pastry of some sort with their tea. She was the one who could be bothered to move to the end of the table in order to get in the frame of the picture. She doesn’t open her mouth and her smile fails to reach her eyes. I suspect she had bad news she was not thrilled to announce; her cat ran away or the local pastor was caught cheating. Betty’s problem was that she was too woke.
*I had been digging through a pile of photographs, the search had become so perilous that I felt as if my fingertips were becoming glossy. The top photograph had become mildly interesting to me so in my pocket it went. Something about the obviously calculated compositional choice gave me a warm feeling akin to knowing the source of an inside joke. Ah, yes, the rule of thirds. Somewhere, layers below the surface of discarded photographs, there lay an image I knew to be its sister. The same boat, but much further away, lay on the same left third of the image. The sky over cast, the water made dull. The sail boat had not moved, simply the camera had. The plot ironed itself out in that moment. These pictures were the result of a depth of field assignment for a photography class. The student, good, dedicated, and possibly dense, had listened well when the professor mentioned the rule of thirds but failed to understand how to execute depth of field. Hopelessly dedicated as they were, they decided upon capturing a photo of a boat up close and then paddling a significant distance in order to get a further depth from the boat. They had paddled so far as to almost render the boat nonexistent on the horizon, unfortunately the effort translated to a C- for our protege. The defeat led the photographer to discard the evidence at a local scrap store, hoping to forget the failure.
*It is a miracle that I was able to apprehend this photograph. This picture was the very one sent to Wes Anderson back in 2012 when he was on the hunt for a location to film what became his most successful movie, “The Grand Budapest Hotel“. Anderson, being the meticulous director he was, found it of utmost importance to find the perfect location to film. The owner of this hotel was affluent and supremely interested in Wes Anderson‘s whereabouts. He was notified through his various connections that Anderson was concocting a new production that necessitated a hotel. The hotel owner became inconsolably excited, and hired someone to capture his business in an appealing way that would influence Wes to choose his humble nine story complex. He was quoted as saying “take special care to include our serene lake beneath a cloudless sky, it compliments our facility quite perfectly“. The photographer had to wait many days in order to seize an opportunity of a cloudless sky, it took but one shot to acquire this beautiful picture. The hotel staff was summoned for a meeting hours after the print emerged, the owner was certain Anderson would bring them to the attention of Hollywood. The photo arrived on Wes Anderson’s desk about a week later, he gave it a moment's glance and subsequently felt his search was futile and chose to build his own in eastern Germany. Besides, he favored pinks and orange over blue.
*A good teacher is one who teaches, a great teacher is one who innovates. That is why professor Krakauer will forever be considered great by the class of 2017. This anatomy teacher asked himself the hard questions, such as: how can one simulate color blindness? That’s right, this professor asked himself that. In a thought process which no one can fully hope to follow, Dr. Krakauer ingeniously came out with these pictures which simulate protanopia and deuteranopia type color blindness which is characterized by the lack of warm colors. Somehow this professor was able to get a green effect on his images, somehow. We are beyond grateful he did. His inspiration? He himself had three sons who all suffered from color blindness. When asked about it, he simply said, “I wanted to create a more empathetic community for the colorblind”. So humble.
*This may seem like a tranquil, possibly happy occurrence in the local city park. Luckily, I have the inside scoop. These people were, in fact, severely confused and disappointed. Have you ever been promised something unbelievably thrilling? These people had, the governor of St. Louis had promised a live performance of Sargent Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band by none other than The Beatles themselves. Huge crowds turned up for the event confused to find no seating arrangements and British-Royal-Guard-looking-schmucks occupying all of the grassy lawn. Adults have been conditioned to display passive patients in public settings, so quietly they circled the marching members and watched in bewilderment. An hour in, it seemed there was not going to be any Beatles. The governor disappeared that day, sometime in the mid afternoon, allegedly he had run away to Puerto Rico. Their town was bankrupt and the Beatles reported no knowledge of the event. The townspeople, to this day, never say the mayor’s name out of deep shame.
*The setting is a trolley in San Francisco in the late 80’s. The man on the left has traveled a great deal following the man on the right. You see, the man on the left is a detective (he wears the nationally recognized detective hat) and the man on the right, as normal as he may seem (but is he so normal given he has the big nose of a liar? And we all know that people who say the trolley fees are worth the slow transportation without any protection from the elements is lying to themselves. Also, what’s with the hairline? He looks like Count Dracula head butted him on his right temple.), is under investigation for murdering his wife. Law enforcement had the suspect under custody earlier but was unable to find evidence. The detective, who has never disappointed, was the last resort that everyone needed and no one deserved. He is also the one who informed me that, in fact, the suspect did murder his wife... by boring her to death.
*This hunk of a building is from the Harry Potter world. No really, it actually is. If you focus on the back streets of Diagon Alley during Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone you can see the base of this architectural beauty. J.K. Rowling saw this little market in the City of London and there conceived the idea of Diagon Alley. There was not going to even be a convenient little street where Hogwarts students could buy anything they could think they ever needed until she saw this building. She said, in that moment, she knew the street belonged to Harry. Previously she had planned to have students get their supplies like any other child would: through Amazon. But thanks to this tower of inspiration, we have the bustling festival we all know and love. So thanks, J.K. for traveling the world before committing to a storyline you would have regretted!
*Having grown up there, I knew this to be Chicago. Don’t ask me where the palm tree came from, because that’s actually an evergreen whose base is abnormally high off the ground. But anyway, the place isn’t so important as the couple pictured in the forefront of the image. The woman is very impatient, she has become that way because she is dating a human puppy. The guy gets distracted by everything, but at least he can carry the take out. It’s about 5:27pm in early summer, her favorite TV show starts in 3 minutes. She hoped it wouldn’t be too much to ask for them to get a pleasant walk in without missing the beginning. But, alas, the line was long at Panda Express and her boyfriend was distracted by how weirdly shaped the evergreen across the street was, with its abnormally high base.
*This couple likes to have fun. In this snapshot they are spontaneously getting their feet wet! In their clothes! It’s crazy, if a big enough wave comes through, there is the possibility that the hems of their clothes will get a bit damp. Luckily, they aren’t completely bonkers and have brought their beach towels, just in case things get out of hand. It’s funny because, the couple is standing in front of two kids who had properly prepared for the occasion, with their bathing suits and their towels... actually I think the couple took their towels. Those towels are too brightly colored to be theirs, those are definitely childrens' towels. This couple is so savage. Look at the way they are smiling, they know they are so cool. I hope to be like them one day.
*This is not a simple landscape photo. This is wedding photography done by a really unique guy. The wedding is taking place in the center of the photo all the way at the end of the cliff, it is so small it is almost indistinguishable. This photographer didn’t think through this shot. To him, it would be cool to get a picture that showcased the whole beach where the ceremony took place. But he failed to anticipate the 30-something people who would essentially photobomb the shot. He also took so long to get that far that he missed ten minutes of the ceremony, the bride and groom had said “I do” and walked down the isle as man and wife before the photographer returned to his post. He felt the golden light really made the water pop. If you ask the newlyweds, they absolutely regret having hired him.